LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH!
Love is wonderful but life is difficult!
Without respect and a healthy vision of what keeps love alive and your relationship thriving, you will be cast into the group of the naďve.
We are not just logical beings; we are emotional-relational beings. If we are not emotionally nurtured, we deteriorate and become stressed, anxious and depressed.
Lonely and Married
None of us gets married thinking that we will struggle with loneliness. As a single person we may have wrestled with periods of aloneness, and sometimes loneliness. We get married to solve this issue. Unfortunately, the fact is that some are struggling with loneliness within marriage. Loneliness within a marriage is painfully difficult. Being married just compounds our loneliness as it makes us feel trapped
. We feel powerless to meet our normal need for connectedness, within the guidelines of our morals and commitments.
Just like a good diet energizes and sustains our bodies, emotional connectedness empowers us as people. However, many have not naturally acquired from their family of origin the skills to emotionally nurture others. Emotional intelligence is absolutely critical for successful relationships, but especially for coupling and parenting. These skills can be taught to children, teens and adults.
Don’t starve your partner! They need you! You need them! We need each other! You can learn how to empower them and send them out the door every day with energy and vitality.
Trauma is REAL!
Research has clearly shown that trauma can literally scar the brain. We know that adults are significantly affected by trauma, often causing emotional, addictive and behavioural issues, as well as relational and cognitive dysfunction. It will seriously affect your important relationships. If you or your partner have been traumatized by loss, motor vehicle accidents, illness, anxiety and depression, abuse or other traumatization, seek help, as it does spiral and affect all your relationships.
Choreographic Coupling Communications
For years, counseling has recognized that process is more important than content. Business now also understands that how we communicate and establish trust relationships with employees, partners and clients is critical. There is nothing more important than TRUST!
Coupling is like a highly choreographic swim team. Can you imagine doing this with poor communication skills? Communication allows trust to continue. When communication breaks down we begin to second-guess motive. You and I thrive on love and respect. When communication breaks down, fear sets in and causes havoc with our childhood or dating wounds. We begin to stumble over what used to be simple. Effective communication is critical for successful relationships. Communication involves skill development. This generation understands the communication skills we inherited from the last generations are just NOT ENOUGH!
You need to learn to not just hear – but listen! You need to not just listen. You need to decode and understand. You need to be able to not just understand, you need to be able to understand the story in the context of your partner’s history. It is not enough to just understand – it is important that your partner feels understood! Then you need to be able to have the emotional intelligence skills to respond to your ‘partner’s needs’ or ‘the relationship needs’. That takes time and skill. But it is all doable!
It is my opinion that EVERY couple can be helped through improving their communication choreography... no matter how skilled they are individually. We are a Choreographic Coupling Communications studio. Come, let’s learn to dance through communication!